Sunday, September 2, 2012

Red Writing Hood.

Knock, knock.
{Who's there?}
{Patricia who?}
My kick-butt featured sponsor, Patricia. Duh.
That was really lame. But she's definitely not.
Check out her post about the benefits of spending time alone
and then be sure to go say "hey" on her blog!
Happy Sunday!

Hello readers!! I've been a stalker follower of Andrea's for a loooong time now, I absolutely love her blog.  Allow me to introduce myself.  I'm Patricia, and I write over at Red Writing Hood.  I blog about my life, writing, art, my friends (who are my world, really) and everything in between.  I'm loud, sometimes vulgar, ALWAYS honest, and I'd like to think every now and then I'm hilarious.  But that's probably just wishful thinking. A little about me--I'm from Tennessee, I live in Utah, I just completed EMT Certification and one of these days hope to be both a firefighter and a New York Times bestseller.  Random, right?
Anyway, that's me, so stop by and say hello sometime!
I was trying to think up good ideas for things to write about, and I spoke with my very very best friend Madi who mentioned something that I'm really good at, whether I like it or not--being alone.  Now, that sounds a little depressing maybe, but that's exactly why it's such a good topic to write about, and hopefully you can either agree with me on this or get some insight into it.  In blog land it's not uncommon to see everyone's posts of their hubbies, kids, boyfrands, girlfrands, and in my case more often my friends......
we all have people who love and support us, and that's good.  
But that's not all that matters.
I think the reason that I'm such an expert on being alone is because I was forced into it.  From a young age I was neglected and had to do most things on my own.  At 15 I was parentless and thrust into the world.  I don't know that I was especially bitter, because I don't think that kids can truly be bitter even if they want to be.  I was 'hard', though.  You're just going to have to do this alone, I told myself over and over again.  Nobody is going to help you, nobody is holding your hand.  I'll never forget the line of the poem in Dr. Seuss' book 'Oh! The Places You'll Go!'   
...Dr. Seuss knew precisely what he was talking about. 

An almost immediate first reaction I get when I approach this subject is, 'You're not alone! You have people who care!' or, 'I have children...I'm never alone..' and that's exactly my point.  Being alone is good for the soul.  Being alone is a positive thing.  Like all things it is meant to be enjoyed in moderation (though sometimes you will, or have, probably sat there thinking IS THIS GONNA BE FOREVER?!) but that's just my point...alone time is great.  Never be too afraid of being alone with yourself in anything you're doing, whether it's travel, studying, 
trying a new hobby, or whatever you're into.
The thing is, being around people always gives us insights to how they think and feel.  We spend time on our bonds with them (assuming those relationships are healthy, anyway) but alone time is when you get to bond with yourself.  I can't tell you the things I've learned about who I want to be while by myself.  It's just easier for that deep and very important voice inside you to speak up when there is nobody else around to turn to for advice.  Not only that, but you know your dreams and aspirations and goals better than your friend or husband or children or dog ever, ever will.  You need that self-affirming time to reflect on those goals and move forward with them.  Being alone has a bad rap, but it's really a great thing for us, even during those times we really don't want to be alone and are anyway. 
 It makes us stronger.  
So, this week I urge you to get some YOU time!! Take a day off work/school and plan something nice.  I'd suggest doing outdoorsey stuff since the weather is melting down to 
that perfect fall temperature, and nature is probably the best place to discover yourself, 
but if it's not your thing, then I'm sure you can find something.  
Here are a few of my favorite things to do alone:
  • Take a new yoga class, or some other athletic class you're not familiar with at all.
  • Go to youtube and find some guided meditations...they have great ones, and they're free!!
  • Spa day.  Enough said there.
  • Get out.  Drive, or fly. (Cheapoair has local flights for less than $'s nice to just be in the air!)
  • Write a letter to your past self, or your future self.  Give advice, or talk about your goals.
  • For that matter, write a letter to anyone you have something to say to and can't, or shouldn't.
  • Go to a museum or cathedral.  It's easier to learn and appreciate art and architecture without friends.
  • Go to a comedy show or find one on Netflix.  Nothing soothes the lonely soul like laughter.
  • Make up an alter-ego of yourself, or a super hero or super villain.  It can be as serious or as funny as you'd like.  I have about three alter-egos and one super villain....I know, too many comic book movies coming out lately.  But it's a great exercise to learn self-exploration.  What are your best qualities? What are your worst?  In an exaggerated world what qualities would surface?  If nothing else then you get to make a parody character of yourself which turned out to be the most hilarious thing I've ever done, probably.  
Well, there's some ways to get yourself started on really loving and appreciating alone time! If what you're doing scares you a little, that's okay.  It's supposed to.  As much fun as locking yourself in the bedroom and reading a book is, it's not really the same as going out to a foreign part of town (or if you're like me, a foreign country) alone.  You will be proud of yourself, you will get a chance to sort of 'reset' your path in life, and you can extra-appreciate your loved ones when you see them again! 
So get out there and be lonely.  Enjoy! 


  1. Great to meet you Patricia! I LOVE this post. I am an expert at being alone. There is nothing I love more then spending some quality time with myself. It's a great way to recharge the old batteries. The danger for me is liking being alone too much ... to the point where I can go days without seeing people and be fine ... huh ... probably should work on that.

    Heading over to your blog to say hi!

  2. so nice to meet your new sponsor. I am not very good at being alone - but I always surprise myself with how much I enjoy the small amount of alone time that I do get... and I like Patricia's suggestions for new ways to appreciate the solitude


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